If you couldn't already tell, yes, that's a joke, and no, this film is not scary. I may never get scared by films, ever, but this film is not scary. This film is so not scary, the two little girls in the theater with me, ages six and nine, were completely unaffected by it. Wow, this film is unscary. Kind of amusing that people would claim that it is indeed THE SCARIEST MOVIE EVAR!!!!
Okay, so now that I've gotten that out of the way, I can get on with my review.
Well. Where to begin?
This film is... interesting? Perhaps one of the better horror films I've seen in a little while, but still nothing special. Not a complete waste of time, but not worth paying for or going out of your way to see. It's kind of a hard film to review.
The movie starts off with one of those damned notes attached to the beginning of pretty much every handy-cam film known to man, saying something about how the footage was found and rereleased, blah blah blah. Then we jump right into the action. Did I say action? I'm sorry. I meant boring.
So, there's this couple who recently moved in together, and off camera, the girl told her that she had been followed by a spirit for all of her life, and it did weird shit like whisper her name, and a shadow would stand over her bed and shit like that. This was why Michah blew half a paycheck on a camera, so he could capture it on tape. They talk about it and talk about it and talk about it, and did I mention they talk about it? Well, they do. Lots of talking about it.
The male protagonist, Michah, I believe, is eager to see some spooky shit go down. The female protagonist, who's name escapes me for whatever reason, is tired of it. This isn't new to her, it's annoying.
One of the more interesting aspects to this film is the male's complete disregard for the feelings of the female on the subject matter. She desperately tries to convince him to take it seriously and not to piss off the demon, to which he reacts by doing exactly what she said not to. And he pisses off the demon.
You could say it's entirely his fault that this movie occurs, and not just because he bought the camera. Every step of the way, he's looking to communicate, shouting at his empty house, making fun of it, and really just being a total dick. And when he's neck deep in shit, and starting to get scared, he blames the female for all of it, for bringing this spirit into the house. I found this hilarious.
However, did I mention that this movie is slow? It is. Like watching paint dry at times. They spend two-thirds of the film talking about the antagonist, and the antagonist takes fucking forever just to move a door and make some sounds. It rips off the formula of Blair Witch, not only in the perspective aspect, but every night, shit supposedly gets worse and worse until something actually happens.
Throughout most of it, you can't help but feel that these characters aren't in any physical danger. Okay, so the demon is making sounds and moving shit. So? Am I supposed to be freaked out like this?
It's as if the demon is just an annoying little kid, trying to tease and scare his younger sister. Then Michah pisses it off. Then, I guess shit goes down.
The contents of this movie, I have seen before. It's nothing special. Somewhat interesting. Acting is poor. The movie is slow. Typical shit, really. I don't see why the masses have such a boner for it, but whatever.
Mildly interesting. See it for free, if you have nothing better to do, I guess.
